How God Called me to RTC
I'll be sharing why I came to do Respect The Corners and my heart behind fitness/health!
I've always had a passion for fitness & health but have never known what to do with it. I was working out 5 days a week, eating clean food, encouraging others to do so and looking my absolute best. I was wanting to get my major in some area of fitness or nutrition and studied personal training. But I knew that there was a wall in the way of me pursuing anything in this field.
I knew I wanted to use it as an avenue to help people but along the way I became prideful of my abilities, knowledge & strength. Around December, a friend told me about Respect the Corners- a fitness based DTS that specializes in using fitness to minister to others. I was so excited & loved the idea of this but it did seem scary. $10,000 would have to appear out of nowhere, I would have to delay my schooling even more, I would be gone for six months, I wouldn't have a job- endless of excuses.
But I chose to be intentional and pray for around 2 months for this. God would affirm me at least 2- 3 times a day. I knew I was supposed to go but I kind of pushed it under the rug to think about later. I was at a crossfit class (one of my first ones) and shut down because I was the weakest one there. I was getting ready to leave and someone asked, "what's wrong?" And I told her how it's intimidating and kind of discouraging because everyone else is so strong! She then goes on to say, "With crossfit, you need to leave your ego at the door. You're never going to be the best, the strongest, the wisest or the fastest" and in that moment God directly told me that is why He called me to do RTC.
For so long I struggled with pride and the fear of not being the best. When other people would talk about their victories with eating clean for a week I would criticize them for doing something wrong. Or when people would see results or hit a new personal record I would secretly be jealous that it wasn't me. Instead of celebrating them, I was taking their victory and telling myself that I needed to match up to what they had accomplished. I would bring it into my weekly workouts and their victory would be my motivation. While I would be working out I would imagine their Instagram post describing their good news and push myself harder so I could match up to them. Somewhere along the way, the enemy convinced me that I was not as valuable as them if I had cellulite, if I did not lift as much as them, if I didn't know all the vitamins & nutrition tips and especially one particular thing. If other people were being praised for their hard work and I wasn't.
Before coming here I was filled with so much fear because I knew I would not be the most fit person. I knew I wouldn't be able to lift as much as many of the people also doing the program. I would go through weeks of working out a lot for the intentions of wanting to be as strong as I could before coming. But Jesus convicted me and told me to stop. I stopped working out pretty much entirely for three months before coming here to Kona.
Arriving here I was at my heaviest weight ever and looking my worst, but because of the truth that I had placed over all of my self image lies- I never once have struggled with my self image. That is all Jesus!
Now I know that doing Respect The Corners is not going to magically change all of that and doing this program will make me perfect by any means but I do think that it will create a healthy foundation of the what fitness is, what it is to me, what it is not to me, who God is, who God is to me, why he has given me this passion for fitness and how I can use it to further His kingdom.
But I will say, it has already been so great, humbling & transformative. God has been tearing out all the old lies, taking out fears and replacing them with truth.
If you are reading this and are interested in Respect The Corners but you're worrying about not being fit enough or strong enough- I rebuke that lie in Jesus name. Everybody here is in different places with how much they lift, different body types, different passions and different places with their walk with the Lord. I would encourage you to get that fear out and replace it with truth. Fear is not of the Lord and the enemy just wants to stop you from a life changing experience.
(1 timothy 4:8 changed my life..so go ahead and let it marinate over your lies)